I wanted to toss back a few cold ones tonight, so I bought a case of beer. At the beer distributor, I didn't know what kind of beer to get--a cheap beer or an expensive beer? The man at the beer distributor said, "what are you in the mood for?"
"Something that will inspire me," I said.
"Inspiration doesn't come cheap," he said. So I got the expensive beer.
And here I sit. Inspired. Maple beer--what a crock. But if you put any beer in a nice glass, it makes all the difference!!! That's not true, that's just what I've been telling myself.
But today was also an exciting day as far as butter making goes. I was at the store, thinking about what kind of butter to make, and I thought, "enough playing it safe. It's time to spice things up!" I thought about tarragon, but that didn't seem seasonally appropriate. It was an especially cold President's Day, so I decided to go with a Mexican pepper butter...to warm me up of course! This butter, however, was difficult to negotiate. In the end, the butter proved to be delicious, but had a...weird consistency. That's okay though--to me, butter is butter, no matter what! I melted the butter over some popcorn and it was one of the best popcorns I've ever had. And I have had some good popcorns in my life, let me tell you. When I perfect this butter...who knows what kind of food collaborations will be born!
That's not all there was to my day, though. I watched a movie. "The Safety of Objects", do you know it? It's based off a book of short stories. I'll be honest, I watched it with a woman. We sat across the room from each other while watching the movie. This woman, I met her through a dating service online, and this is the first date I've had in a long long time. She seemed to have enjoyed herself...although she left right after I offered her some popcorn drizzled with my homemade butter. It was odd, I said, "Helen, would you like to meet for a cup of coffee?"
She said, "I'd rather come over to your place and watch a movie, in the dark, of course, ha, ha, ha!" She is an odd one, Helen. She chose the movie and it was a little "sexual" for my tastes, I guess. Helen is a funeral director. Tonight, she wore a...tie. She has a strange laugh, kind of a cackle. It was something I'd imagine coming from someone who worked with the dead. She had just come back from China and kept relating everything that happened to her trip.
"Wooooow," I kept saying. I'm not sure whether I should keep on waiting for the perfect woman to come around. You can perfect many things, like butter, but you can't perfect another person. That's for damn sure. The closest one gets to perfection in another person is...youtellme. Frankly, I have a hard time imagining a woman in my life. It's complex, but I mean, it's not really complex. Like making a lasagna, for instance. I think I'll know when I know.
Helen is not a fan of maple beer. And I guess I'm not...and that's a start.
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