Need

Homes once said to me: "Curt, it is about wanting and need, wanting need."
I said, "Wanting and need?"
"And wanting need," Homes said. "Don't forget the wanting need part."
"Wanting and need and wanting need."
"Right."

I've been wanting and needing many, many things. Maybe I haven't said so directly in this blog, but I have been wanting and needing many, many things. Just read what I've written and you will read, if you've really read, my wanting and my needing of many, many things.

Maybe I should have just come out and told you my wanting and my needing when the opportunity presented itself. If I could whisper on this blog, then I would have whispered to you my wanting. Then, I would have whispered to you my needing. Then, you would know why I am the way I am and why you are the way you are. Because, wanting and needing are two different things, too different of things, and yet, they occupy the same space and this space is terrible and exciting and a disease that is neither good nor bad, but called a disease anyhow because it has the potential to be very good or very bad. We will never know, and that's okay. That is part of wanting and needing.

But wanting need? It is also about wanting need?

What it would be like to want need! Not just to have and not need to need. No, but wanting need. Having and wanting need.

How do I get there?