I am shot in the head

It came out of nowhere. I was walking the dogs when I was struck by a bright yellow stick. Clyde appeared from behind some bushes and said, "Got you!"

I picked up the stick and inspected it in my hand. It had a rubber end and it was light. "Give me that," Clyde said and grabbed the stick from my hand. He was holding a plastic gun. My eyes widened. "What," Clyde said, "it's like you've never seen a Nerf gun before."
"I haven't," I said, "ever seen a nerd gun."
"It's Nerf, with an f, not nerd. Geez, where have you been?"
"Nerf?" I said. "What's that even mean?"
"Are you kidding me?"
"Nerf," I said. "Nerf. Nerf. Sounds weird."
"Are you from this planet?" Clyde said.
"I was in prison."
Clyde held up his gun. "For what?"
"Those things don't hurt," I said.
A white stick flew at my face and bounced off my forehead. "Hey," I said, "why'd you do that?"
"Why were you in prison?"
"I did something very bad," I said.
"What did you do?" Clyde said.
"Killed my best friend, with a bullet."
Clyde lowered his plastic gun. "That sucks," he said.
"You're telling me," I said.
"Sorry," he said.
"I'm Curt," I said.
"I know."

Clyde ran down the block, like he always does, it seems. He is not much younger than I am, but one could say is full of youthful energy!