Bestest

For the most part, I like Monica's friends. Some of her friends are now my friends too. For a long time, well, ever since I got out of prison, left the bars, the stoney lonesome, the slammer, the greybar hotel, the hole, the guardhouse, the clink, whatever you want to call it, behind, I've made few, and strange, acquaintances. I think they were more like "encounters" than they were "hanging out" sessions, more than they were "getting to know you" times or "let's do this again, soon" moments. It was all so crazy then! Ha!

Let me tell you something about Monica. She is very hyperbolic. Everything is either the best or the worst, the biggest or the smallest, the sweetest or the bitterest, the cheapest or the most expensive (but she says expensivest), the cleanest or grimiest--you get the picture? So all of Monica's friends are either the nicest or the shyest or the funniest or the hairiest or the shortest or the tallest. What am I?! Monica introduces me as "Curt, the bestest roommate everrrr."

The hairiest friend, Marvin, likes to tell stories. He told a story today. It was about going under with anesthesia. He said that when he went under and came back, he felt like a different person, that his name, Marvin, sounded wrong to him. He doesn't like to be called Marvin, so now we call him something else that I can't remember right now. After he left, it was late--it was like 5 minutes ago. Now I am typing this and I've just found a long strand of hair (probably Marvin's) on the keyboard. Monica is brushing her teeth. She brushes her teeth for literally five minutes. Monica has the cleanest teeth ever.

So sparkling white!