Dear Loyal Reader,
There are some things on my mind. I think we should talk about them.
Where are the boundaries in our relationship? What if I was in love? Would I tell you? Should I tell you? That is something to consider. Have I been acting different lately? A little aloof? Unpredictable even? Do you wonder where I've been, what I've been up to? Why I didn't post on Saturday?
Is that any of your business?
Who are you, anyways? I'm not sure I can trust you!
Reader, I've been putting a lot of personal stuff in the BBB, and now it's out there, and now it's scaring me!
If we were just out at the bar, having a drink, would I have told you all this stuff? Wouldn't I have just sat there, staring at my drink, trying every once in a while to tell a joke or to give a funny retort to some great story you told? Wouldn't I have gotten excited and tried to talk too fast and then been embarrassed and said to myself, Curt, you aren't that interesting. Why do you keep talking as if you are??? and then just clammed up.
Later, in your apartment, winding down, would you have said to your wife, Curt was there. He was quiet. He is a hard person to know. I think maybe he doesn't like me.
Or, Curt is so quiet, I think there is something wrong with him.
Is there something wrong with me? Is this blog an illumination? A journal of my mental well-being, or lack thereof?
I'm not as quiet as I used to be. Or I am, it's just that I'm around some people now I'm comfortable talking to. Or there are always people around who I just don't click with. Or I'm even more quiet, I just feel less so because I write now.
In prison, I read Games People Play. Have you ever read that? Are you playing games with me?
I'm in love.
Do you believe me?
Yours til the kitchen sinks,
CGJ
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